


Cleaning Up His Messes

by hopingforaword



Category: Smash (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, M/M, Moments, weird format
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-09
Updated: 2017-03-09
Packaged: 2018-10-01 14:25:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,718
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10191959
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hopingforaword/pseuds/hopingforaword
Summary: Hey hmu athopingforaword.tumblr.comAlso, if you really like my work you can "buy me a coffee"





	

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [don't call it love](https://archiveofourown.org/works/7630810) by [ShippingEverything](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShippingEverything/pseuds/ShippingEverything). 



“You're a great nurse, Ky.”

Jimmy's nose was steadily dripping blood onto the floor of the boys’ bathroom. Kyle smiled slightly. “I'm not a great nurse. All I did was give you Advil and clean the scratches. I can't do anything for your bruises. Here, pinch your nose.” He handed Jimmy a wad of tissues and Jimmy took it. 

“Thanks Kyle.” Jimmy pinched his nose. “You can go to class. I can deal with a bloody nose by myself.”

“You have to stop doing stuff like this. Eventually you're gonna get caught.” 

Jimmy snorted. “I'm not letting assholes get away with being assholes just because I might get in trouble.”

“What if they tell all the high schools and none of them take you?” 

“They have to take me somewhere Kyle. You can't drop out after eighth grade.”

“Just do it for me, please? I don't want you to get hurt.” 

“Pain is just weakness leaving the body.” Jimmy grinned at Kyle, but Kyle stood his ground. “Fine. For you. Anything for you, Kyle.”

“Right. Anything.”

* * * * *

“Where were you last night?”

“Huh?” Jimmy blinked at Kyle, the cold afternoon wind turning his cheeks red, before he smacked his forehead. “Shit. We were supposed to study for history. I’m sorry.”

“Where were you? Your brother didn’t know either. He said you’d just gone out.”

“Did you–?”

“Don’t worry. I called a few minutes later and said you’d just been late because of the subway. But where were you?” Jimmy hesitated, and Kyle sighed. “C’mon, Jimmy. We’re supposed to be best friends. Just tell me.”

Jimmy shifted from one foot to the other. “I was at Amanda Blunkin’s house.”

“Amanda Blunkin the senior?”

“The very same.”

“What’d she want with you?”

Jimmy scuffed his shoes on the pavement distractedly. “She thinks I’m cute. She wanted to get to know me better.”

“Oh.” Kyle blinked and looked down the street, pretending to look for his mother’s car. “Did you?”

Jimmy pulled the collar of his shirt towards his shoulder, exposing a small purple hickey. Kyle stared at it, transfixed. “I didn’t know she wanted to… I thought we’d just drink or something. I didn’t know... I’m sorry I forgot.”

Kyle shrugged. “We’re fifteen now. The girl stuff was bound to start soon. Was it… did you have fun?” Both boys looked away shyly, kicking at pebbles.

“I guess. It was weird too. She was clearly… experienced and I was pretty clueless.”

“Well you’re more experienced now, huh?” Kyle laughed hollowly and Jimmy echoed him. “If you feel like sharing, how experienced?”

“Third.”

“Cool.” Jimmy looked concerned, so Kyle forced a smile. “I guess that makes you cooler than me, huh Jim?”

Jimmy laughed and Kyle relaxed. So long as Jimmy was happy, he could be happy. “Please,” Jimmy said, throwing his arm around Kyle’s shoulder, “I’ve always been cooler than you Kyle.”

* * * * *

“Please, Mrs. Hennis, don’t suspend Jimmy.” Kyle had never considered a career in law, but as he begged for his best friend to be allowed to stay in school, he thought maybe he’d be good at it. 

“Why shouldn’t I? He was fighting on school property.”

“Is Raider getting suspended?” Jimmy grumbled from his seat. Kyle shot him a look and he rolled his eyes, crossing his arms as he did so.

“As the principal, I cannot discuss the punishment of any other student, even Mr. Raider. We are here to talk about you, Mr. Collins. Do you have anything to say for yourself?”

“Please, Mrs. Hennis, if I may?” Mrs. Hennis sighed and Kyle silently thanked whatever it was that made adults like him. Jimmy needed him to clean up his messes for him, and Kyle was just happy he was able to do it. “Jimmy, while mistaken in resorting to physical violence, was simply standing up to a long-time bully who has physically and emotionally assaulted much of our school community. I believe this was Jimmy’s way of simply saying enough was enough.”

“Well, what did Mr. Raider do that led to Mr. Collins’s incredibly reckless and detrimental actions?”

Kyle looked uncomfortably from Mrs. Hennis to Jimmy. He couldn’t tell her. He didn’t want to. Jimmy caught his eye and said bluntly, “Raider called Kyle a fag.”

Mrs. Harris looked from one to the other. “Is this true Kyle?” Kyle nodded. “So Mr. Collins did this to defend you?” Kyle nodded again. Mrs. Harris sighed. “Two weeks of detention, Mr. Collins. But if you ever get caught fighting again…”

 

“So was Raider telling the truth?” Jimmy asked. He and Kyle were sitting on the roof of some apartment building Jimmy had the keys to. Kyle suspected the keys were the result of the many, many times Jimmy had “found” a girl’s key ring in his bag after hooking up with them. He knew Jimmy always returned the keys eventually. Jimmy let out a puff of smoke and offered the joint he had between his fingers. Kyle rarely smoked, and didn't ever smoke without Jimmy, but the turn of the conversation was making him anxious. He took the joint, not thinking about how Jimmy’s fingers felt against his own. 

“The truth about what?” Kyle asked, prolonging the inevitable and taking a drag. 

“You. Are you, you know, gay?” Jimmy looked off over the buildings, vaguely towards Manhattan. He had never been good with eye contact, and Kyle knew it was Jimmy trying to respect his privacy, but he wished Jimmy would look at him sometimes. 

Kyle took another drag before answering. “Yeah.”

“Oh.” Jimmy took the joint back from Kyle and took a drag, turning his head towards Kyle, but still looking at the edge of the roof. “That's why you didn't want me to set you up with Tina?” He looked up and Kyle saw that he was smiling. Everything was going to be okay. 

“Yeah.”

“You like any guys in particular, or just kind of general gay-ness?”

Kyle snorted, but responded cautiously. “I like this guy, but I know he's straight.”

Jimmy smiled wryly. “Bad luck, dude. Doesn't matter. I bet he doesn't deserve you anyway. At least you'll always have me.” He bumped his shoulder against Kyle’s with a grin. 

“Yeah. Always.” Kyle laid down, his back pressed against the roof, looking up at the stars. “There are so many stars in Queens.” Jimmy nodded, lying back beside him. 

“Do you think we'll ever be happy Jimmy?”

“Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe this is as good as it gets. But I doubt it. I don't think anything is as good as it gets in high school. Maybe the weed.” He turned to look at Kyle, and in his peripheral vision Kyle saw sincerity etched in Jimmy’s face. “High school is the worst. It sucks and it's gonna keep sucking. But someday, someday soon, it'll be just you and me, living together and taking the world by storm. Just us and our endless stream of admirers.” Kyle smiled, but as Jimmy turned to look at the sky, Kyle’s smile fell. Jimmy would always have an endless stream of admirers, and Kyle would always be stuck watching. 

* * * * *

“I can't believe your folks are paying for this place. We haven’t even graduated yet.”

Kyle nodded as he looked around their new apartment. “Maybe they finally got tired of all your lady ‘friends’ joining us for Sunday brunch. Maybe they were just tired of us living in the house with them”

Jimmy laughed, throwing his jacket over the couch. “Well, now that they're finally gone and everything is unpacked, should we throw a party?”

“Seventeen is not suddenly the drinking age, Jimmy.”

“Yeah, and pot’s still illegal.” Jimmy threw a pointed look at Kyle’s breast pocket, where he knew a joint and lighter sat waiting for the next time Kyle went outside. 

Kyle rolled his eyes. “It makes me feel good. And don't say it.” Jimmy’s mouth snapped shut and he smiled at Kyle. “Fine. We can have a party. But none of  _ those _ girls.”

“Which ones?”

“The ones that contribute to your little problem.”

Jimmy took a deep breath and looked into Kyle’s eyes. Jimmy had gotten over his fear of eye contact, but the dark chocolate of his eyes still shocked Kyle. “I'm done with that. You know I am. How else would I have gotten out of rehab?”

“I believe you. And you can prove that my belief is not misplaced by not inviting any of those girls.”

Jimmy huffed. “Yes Kyle.” He turned away to get something before looking back at Kyle. “What's the policy on friends staying overnight?”

“Friends of what sort?” Jimmy grinned devilishly and Kyle sighed. 

“We have our own rooms, so I won't say anything if you don't.”

Jimmy grinned. “Of course Ky.” He threw Kyle a grin as he walked up to his bedroom, and Kyle returned it half-heartedly.

* * * * *

“Wooo! We’re graduates, Kyle, class of ‘02!” Jimmy punched the air before falling down onto the couch and grabbing a beer off the end table. Kyle sat down gently next to him. 

“Maybe you should slow down, Jimmy. Everyone left two hours ago and you haven’t stopped drinking yet. You’re worrying me.”

Jimmy pointed at Kyle with the top of his beer. “I can stop drinking whenever I want to. This is nothing like with the other stuff.”

“Okay. Prove it. Stop now.” Kyle sat forward, staring at Jimmy draped over their couch.

“But I don’t wanna.”

Kyle took a long deep breath and looked at the ceiling. He had to stop enabling Jimmy, and he knew his resolve would crack if he looked at him. “But I want you to.”

“‘S not fair,” Jimmy whined, “You’re still drunk.”

“I’m a lot less drunk than you, and I’m not still drinking. Please, Jimmy.”

Jimmy sighed and put his beer down on the table. “Happy?”

Kyle leaned back and curled into Jimmy’s side. Jimmy had grown more comfortable with being close to people, especially Kyle, in the last few years, and Kyle knew he exploited it but at that moment he couldn’t bring himself to care. “Yes.”

Absently, Jimmy started stroking Kyle’s hair. “You’re so great, Kyle. You look out for me when I don’t even think it’s important to look out for me. I think you like Jimmy more than I like Jimmy. Why? Why don’t you find someone better for you?” 

Kyle shrugged. “I don’t need someone better. I have you.”

“I love you, Kyle.”

“I love you too, Jimmy.”

“Not like that,” Jimmy said, and Kyle’s heart rate quickened. It couldn’t be happening. This wasn’t the way it was supposed to happen, if it ever happened. Jimmy was too drunk, too emotional. 

“What do you mean?”

Jimmy scoffed. “Don’t be dumb. You know what I mean.” He moved so he was looking at Kyle. “I love you. Do you love me?”

“Don’t be an ass,” Kyle said to the floor, “You know I do.”

Jimmy moved forward and his lips collided with Kyle’s. Kyle was kissing him back, but this wasn’t the way this was supposed to happen. Jimmy tasted like a lot of beer and smoke and the girl he had made out with during their graduation party and Kyle knew he probably tasted like weed and beer and that cute boy whose name he never heard. This wasn’t how it was supposed to be. Jimmy pulled back suddenly, and Kyle hoped he was coming to his senses, that Jimmy was going to go to bed and they could try again in the morning. Then he saw Jimmy’s smile and knew he wouldn’t be able to deny whatever Jimmy said next.

“My room or yours?”

In answer, Kyle pulled Jimmy to his room, putting his conscience aside as he shut the door and turned to his bed, where Jimmy was standing, waiting for him.

 

The next morning, Kyle woke up before Jimmy. He stayed still on his bed, watching Jimmy’s chest rise and fall as he slept. Jimmy hadn’t looked so peaceful since he had first moved in with Kyle and his parents after he got out of rehab. Kyle wished he could stop time and just sit there watching Jimmy forever. As soon as he thought it, Jimmy yawned, stretched, and sat up. Kyle sat still, waiting for what Jimmy would say. 

Jimmy looked at Kyle, making quick eye contact before blinking and looking away. “I’m sorry,” he said, looking towards Kyle’s door.

“What?”

“I’m sorry.”

“Sorry about what?”

“I was really out of it last night and I shouldn’t have… It’s not fair to you.”

Kyle blinked. “If this is what you say to girls when you wake up naked next to them, I’m shocked that you can’t get one to stick around.” Kyle rolled out of his bed and pulled on his boxers.

“Kyle, wait,” Jimmy called, scratching his head and copying Kyle’s actions

“Why should I? To give you another chance to mess with my head?” 

“Me, mess with your head? I’m not the one who slept with his straight best friend!”

“You didn’t sound straight last night, asshole. And, if I remember correctly, it wasn’t  _ my _ idea.” Kyle bent over and pulled his sweatpants off the floor, yanking them on

Jimmy walked over to where Kyle stood by his bedroom door. “Look, can we just forget about it? I don’t like guys. It was just…”

“A mistake?” Kyle spat. Jimmy looked at him sadly. Kyle snorted. “I’m going up to the roof for a smoke. I’ll talk to you later.”

* * * * *

“What have we done, Kyle?”

Kyle was laid up in the hospital, both legs in casts and Jimmy sat at the edge of his bed. “Was it because—”

“No,” Kyle cut him off softly. “I just wasn't watching where I was going. I didn't look both ways.” He smiled weakly. “Turns our parents are right when they say you should do that.”

“I'm so sorry. And I know I've been saying sorry since we were seven, but I mean it. If I hadn't started again, you wouldn't have kicked me out and then…”

Kyle snorted. “Make it more about you Jimmy. It's fine. I loved, didn't I? Just promise me you'll stop. For good. I can't deal with the not knowing.” 

“I promise.”

“I have another thing I have to know.”

Jimmy’s heart raced. He knew what this was about. 

“I know you say you don't like to talk about it, but I need to. I know it's been four years, but I've never gotten over it.”

“Me neither.” Jimmy looked at Kyle, who looked on the verge of tears or laughter. “I've never felt as many things for anyone as I do for you Kyle. You're the only person who knows the whole Jimmy Collins story, and I know I don't make it easy to love me. I know I exploited that you do, but maybe—”

“Maybe I shouldn't have asked. Jesus, I've never heard you talk so much about anything, especially about your feelings.” Kyle smirked and Jimmy blushed. 

“So, do you still love me even after you got hit by a car?”

“Depends. Will you at least try to love me more than cocaine?”

Jimmy felt his eyes water. “Ky, I already do. You're the only thing that's always been there for me. You make me feel great and you don't cost anything and I don't ruin my life being around you.”

“Don't cost anything?” Kyle laughed. “Didn't you ever listen to where me and Blake were going on our dates? You're taking me out Collins. Somewhere nice. I want to be thoroughly romanced.” 

Kyle's nurse appeared in the door. “I need to give him his meds.”

Jimmy stood and walked to stand by Kyle’s head. “I'll be heading out then. And hey, don't get hooked on any of these. One of us needs to be sober and help clean up the other one’s messes.” 

“It would be my honor to continue cleaning up your messes, Jimmy Collins.” 

Jimmy bent down and brushed a quick kiss onto Kyle’s forehead. “Feel better. I'll be back tomorrow.”

“Go to work you bum.” Jimmy flashed a smile as he disappeared into the hallway. Kyle was glad that, sixteen years after he first met Jimmy, he could finally be certain that Jimmy would be back.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey hmu at [ hopingforaword.tumblr.com ](hopingforaword.tumblr.com)  
> Also, if you really like my work you can "buy me a coffee" 


End file.
